During the ketubah signing, the groom approaches the bride for the bedeken , or veiling. He looks at her and then veils her face. This signifies that his love for her is for her inner beauty, and also that the two are distinct individuals even after marriage. It also is a tradition stemming from the Bible wherein Jacob was tricked into marrying the sister of the woman he loved because the sister was veiled. If the groom does the veiling himself, such trickery can never happen.
In Jewish ceremonies, the processional and recessional order is slightly different than traditional non-Jewish ceremonies. In the Jewish tradition, both of the groom's parents walk him down the aisle to the chuppah , the altar beneath which the couple exchanges vows. Then the bride and her parents follow. Traditionally, both sets of parents stand under the chuppah during the ceremony, alongside the bride, groom, and rabbi.
A chuppah has four corners and a covered roof to symbolize the new home the bride and groom are building together. In some ceremonies, the four posts of the chuppah are held up by friends or family members throughout the ceremony, supporting the life the couple is building together, while in other instances it may be a freestanding structure decorated with flowers.
The canopy is often made of a tallit , or prayer shawl, belonging to a member of the couple or their families. In the Ashkenazi tradition, the bride traditionally circles around her groom either three or seven times under the chuppah. Some people believe this is to create a magical wall of protection from evil spirits, temptation, and the glances of other women.
Others believe the bride is symbolically creating a new family circle. Traditionally, Jewish brides get married in a wedding band that is made of metal gold, silver, or platinum with no stones.
The only way they could determine the value of the ring was through weight, which would be altered should there be stones in the ring.
In some traditions, the rings are placed on the left forefinger because the vein from your forefinger goes right to your heart. The seven blessings, called the Sheva B'rachot , come from ancient teachings.
They are often read in both Hebrew and English, and shared by a variety of family members or friends, just as friends and family are invited to perform readings in other types of ceremonies. The blessings focus on joy, celebration, and the power of love. They begin with the blessing over a cup wine, then progress to more grand and celebratory statements, ending with a blessing of joy, peace, companionship, and the opportunity for the bride and groom to rejoice together.
As the ceremony comes to an end, the groom or in some instances the bride and groom is invited to step on a glass inside a cloth bag to shatter it. The breaking of the glass holds multiple meanings. Most however do seem to agree that the Jewish Wedding and the breaking of the glass is a reminder of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. This act serves as an expression of sadness at the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. Any glass may be used for the Jewish Wedding glass, although most couples choose a special glass to be broken and kept.
It is commonly wrapped in a cloth napkin to avoid dangerous glass shards or enclosed in a pre-made cloth pouch. Breaking of the Jewish Wedding glass marks the conclusion of the ceremony. In Israel, the glass is broken earlier, prior to the reading of the Ketubah. You may be familiar with the Jewish tradition of the groom breaking the glass at the end of a wedding ceremony under the chuppah.
After he crushes it with his right foot, and the guests shout "Mazel tov! Some view it as a reminder of the destruction of the Temple in Jerusalem. Even during this joyous occasion, we still mourn. Others say the fragility of the glass reminds us of the fragility of relationships. People were thought to be particularly susceptible to demonic possession and curses during rites of passage, like circumcision ceremonies and weddings. Shattering glass, some scholars suggest , would keep demons away.
It would frighten them with a loud noise, or otherwise confuse them into thinking it was an event of mourning, not of celebration. Hajioff writes that glass is shattered rather than, say, ceramic or fine china because it can be remelted and reblown. So we break glass because it recalls our mortality but also the divine promise of immortality of the soul.
Usually the actual glass the couple crushes is a cup used earlier in the ceremony, when a blessing is said over a glass of wine.
Sometimes a plate is used as the glass. It's thought to be a reference to a separate tradition of breaking a plate when a binding contract is sealed, symbolizing its irreversibility.
It's also traditional to break a plate following an engagement agreement between the couple. Right after the glass is broken, the congregation yells out "mazal tov" to wish the couple congratulations, bringing the wedding out of its moment of somberness. But in the past few years, the custom of saying "mazal tov" following breaking the glass has been criticized.
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